I’m 3 Years Sober. Here’s What I Know For Sure.
I’m 3 years sober. What I know for sure is that quitting alcohol is a journey like no other. You’ll travel to the depths of who you really are and find the good, bad, and yep, the slightly ugly. When you quit drinking your world gets bigger and bigger. You feel time in a different way and suddenly there is SO much of it. Getting sober is a complete re-set of life. I’m so damn proud of being 3 years sober.
Here’s what I know for sure…
Let’s start with the good part about being 3 years sober…
Energy, time, clarity, motivation, improved health, better sleep, deeper self-connection, new friends, new hobbies, new experiences, and feeling proud as f*ck for reaching this milestone in this alcohol-centric society that we live in. I could go on and on…
Then there’s… Never having to feel shame or regret at what I did or said because I was drunk. Not having to pretend I remember conversations I know nothing about. Never having to plan everything I do around drinking. Never having to plan my weekend mornings around how hungover I will be. Never having to worry I am still over the limit in the morning when I drive my kids to 7 am sport. No more anxiety. No more 3 am wake-ups unable to get back to sleep and vowing to never drink again - only finding myself pouring another drink come 5 pm. More money, amazing skin, improved fitness, a deeper understanding and love for myself that I’ve never had before. A sense of peace and acceptance that I’m doing exactly what I’m meant to be doing.
It's been like going from living in black and white to living in colour.
Okay, now for the bad bit…
When we quit drinking we start feeling ALL the feels. We stop numbing. So when we feel amazing we feel truly amazing and it's like we are living on cloud nine. But then we have to experience the lows. Some of us have never had to experience the lows before because we have used booze to numb them every time. So we have to do the WORK. We have to face our emotions, start to understand our triggers and go deeper into our own psyche. Which is scary.
Sobriety isn't all rainbows and unicorns. Life is still life. Shit things still happen. We still have to go through what life throws at us. We have to LIVE it – without booze. But here's the thing: When we live life without numbing, we process the uncomfortable emotions so much faster, we come through the hard stuff faster and we learn so much about ourselves because we are present and aware. That’s when the magic happens.
So the bad stuff does have a very special silver lining.
Then there’s the ‘ugly’ bit…
The ugly part is an inescapable time of self-reckoning. You must truly face yourself and decide on how you will create a life you don’t want to numb yourself from. Seeing ourselves head-on like this can feel uncomfortable at first. We start questioning our friendships, relationships, jobs, social lives - and so much more. We live in a world where alcohol is everywhere and our choosing to take a break can impact others. Not drinking often brings up issues for the people around you. It can make you feel isolated or under a microscope. Like you have to constantly justify yourself. Getting through this time takes resolve and yep, some friendships are lost along the way.
Do I miss drinking? Everyone wants to know!
No, I don’t miss alcohol. A small part of me will always miss Young Fun Party Girl Sarah without a care in the world. But honestly, I was using alcohol in my 40s like I didn’t want to grow up. Letting Young Fun Party Girl Sarah go, growing the hell up, rediscovering who I was, and helping others become aware of their own relationships with alcohol has been the greatest thing I’ve ever done.
Xx Sarah
P.S. If this resonates with you and you’d like support and more information, you can read about grey area drinking HERE or join my online community of wonderful, supportive women over at the Women’s Wellbeing Collective.
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